About Me

I am Rauno Alatalo. I was born in 1962 in Helsinki at the Women’s Hospital. It was a time when Finland was beginning to recover from post war challenges. Soon I was taken home to Kerava, to the village of Talma. That is where I spent my early childhood. Around me was open countryside where children could live freely near forests and fields. In Finland in the 1960s children had the chance to live quite carefree lives and find their place in the world.

In the autumn of 1968, when I was six years old, my family moved from Kerava back to South Ostrobothnia. My mother was from Vimpeli and my father from Itäkylä in Lappajärvi. We first moved to Lakaniemi in Vimpeli and the following year in 1969 to the village center of Vimpeli. It was a life change that affected me for a long time. Vimpeli was a small rural municipality known for pesäpallo and strong community spirit. There I grew up and adapted to a new environment. The peaceful countryside and nature shaped me and the direction of my life. In good ways and in difficult ways.

In Vimpeli I grew up, went to school, and learned a lot about life. My school years were not always easy. Nervousness was part of me from a young age. I struggled with stage fright and it was not a small obstacle. During school I often feared disappointing myself and others. I feared being noticed. I feared saying something wrong. Fear was present in my daily life.

At the age of fifteen I left school and started looking for work. I was shy and quiet. It was not an obvious path and it was not easy. Not even completing military service was easy. My first longer job was at Järviseudun Peruna in Vimpeli. I first worked there during autumn seasons and year by year more often. After the army in 1983 I was hired there as a permanent employee. When I was younger I felt education could have taken me further, but because of my anxiety it did not feel possible. I decided to live my life my own way and continue forward.

Alcohol entered my life quite young. It was almost like a shadow I did not know to fear. At first I did not see drinking as a choice. It was simply a way that seemed to ease the invisible weight I carried inside. It numbed anxiety, softened fear, and for a moment made me feel like I belonged. Alcohol gave me courage I could not find on my own.

But what first felt like a friend and protection slowly became a merciless master. Little by little it tightened its grip until I no longer controlled it. It controlled me. Drinking changed from something occasional into a survival method. Eventually my whole life revolved around alcohol.

Years passed like in a fog. I was not happy. I knew I had lost something inside myself, but I could not find a way out. Inner struggle, fear, and disappointment in my own choices followed me everywhere. In the autumn of 1994 something unavoidable happened. Alcohol took full control. It was no longer a shadow in the background. It was the driver and I was only a passenger in my own life.

By 1997, after drinking almost daily for three years, I was deeply tired of my life and my choices. I started thinking more seriously about change. My brother’s tragic death in Pietarsaari on January 1st 1997 at the age of 41 affected me deeply. After that it still took three more years of self reflection before I made the decision to truly try to change myself. That journey was not easy. It was a mental battle with myself. There was not a single day when I was fully satisfied with who I was.

Breaking free from alcohol was not a quick process. It was the result of years of thinking. I knew I had to do something that would change everything. One alternative was to end my life. On some level I even tried. In reality those attempts were cries for help into emptiness. During that time I understood something important. Only I could make the change. No one else. In the end I did not need outside solutions. I could break what kept me drinking. The key was deciding that I would no longer hide my anxiety from anyone.

The moment I finally stopped drinking came on April 2nd 2000. I spent Saturday evening in a restaurant and went home around 01:00 early Sunday morning. I remember sitting on my sofa and looking at a half full bottle of Koskenkorva on the table. I thought. Can I not even stay sober for one hour. That was the beginning. One hour at a time. Without alcohol. It was difficult at first. But every hour and every day brought me closer to life without alcohol. Surprisingly fast I broke free from something I had believed was part of me. Later I realized something. Making the decision was the hardest part. Living after the decision was not.

When I got my life back I wanted to build a future. I met my first wife in Kuopio. After two weeks we moved to Alajärvi in November 2000. She moved from Outokumpu and I moved from Vimpeli. Considering my past our life together was demanding. I am grateful for the years we shared. Our relationship ended after twenty years together. We were married for eighteen of those years. I am thankful for that time.

Through many turns in life I ended up studying at Kauhava Entrepreneurship Institute in 2003. I began studying to become a system specialist. That path led me toward a more independent life and a profession that gave me freedom. In 2004 I also completed a vocational qualification in information processing. I became an entrepreneur on September 1st 2005. It was a major turning point in my life. It opened doors I thought no longer existed for me. Most importantly it meant that the five year goal I set in 2000 had been reached. I had a new profession and a job.

Even though my life has included pain and challenges, I have learned they are part of my journey. Some of them I would not remove even if I could. Today I share my life with my Thai wife Chen Alatalo, née Khunnarasamrong. We got engaged in May 2021 and married in July the same year. Chen has been support and safety in everything I have experienced in recent years. More about that story here. Journey With You

My life has been a long journey. It has included pain, challenges, and moments of despair. It has also been a journey of finding myself. Today I am grateful for all of it because it made me who I am. Life does not need to be feared if you are willing to face it in all its beauty and all its difficulty.

The journey to sobriety was heavy at first. Over the years it turned into strength. Every sober day was a victory. Not over anyone else. Only over myself. I know from experience that real change always starts from inside. It does not need speeches or ceremonies. It needs quiet determination.

Writing has been one way for me to process life and its turning points. Words help me stop and look back. Not through bitterness. Through gratitude. When I write I do not decorate reality. I tell things as they are. The joys and sorrows of life. Victories and losses. Small moments that stay with us and shape us.

I value ordinary life. Rest. Peace. Time with family and friends. The results of my own work. These are real wealth for me. I believe in honesty. I believe in taking responsibility. I believe people should walk their life path on their own feet and through their own decisions.

For me freedom is not freedom from responsibility. It is the right to live my own kind of life. With dignity. Respecting others. At the same time it is also great responsibility. You cannot blame others or circumstances when you have chosen your own path.

The purpose of this website is to share a small part of my story with you. Maybe you are looking for inspiration. Maybe peer support. Maybe just a quiet moment to stop. Life teaches us every day. I believe every person carries a story inside that deserves to be heard.

❤️

This is my story. Honest. Simple. And above all real.

Rauno Alatalo

Man Of Shadows
Lyrics and production R. Alatalo. Music Suno AI Music.

Added 24.10.2025